Your Ultimate Guide to Surviving the 4 Month Sleep Regression
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As a pediatric sleep consultant, one of the most common questions I receive is about the 4-month sleep regression. Before we can talk about surviving the 4 month sleep regression, we need to understand what it really means. The 4 month sleep regression, which is actually a progression in your child’s development, usually occurs between the 3-5 month point and causes your baby’s sleep patterns to change. The biggest change happens in how their sleep cycles are presented. Around 4 months of age, your baby's brain undergoes significant changes in its sleep-wake cycle, which can disrupt their sleep patterns. Before the 4 month sleep regression, your baby probably only had a deep stage and active stage of sleep. But now, they have several lighter stages, a deep stage, and an active or REM stage sort of like how our sleep cycles are.
Sleep regressions in general can be very exhausting for the parents but the 4 month sleep regression kind of catches parents off guard since their perfectly sleeping baby has all of a sudden taken a turn for the worst as far as sleep goes. This was also the time when I personally had my own mental breakdown as a first-time mom. I thought I was exhausted before but when this regression hit, I found a new level of exhaustion that I did not know could exist. I also decided to sleep train my daughter when this one hit because I knew something had to change. If you want to read more about our sleep journey please READ THIS BLOG.
As a pediatric sleep consultant, I've worked with countless families who have struggled with their child's 4 month sleep regression. This can be a challenging time for both babies and parents, but with the right strategies and support, it's possible to get through it and get back to getting the sleep you and your baby need and deserve. In this article, Your Ultimate Guide to Surviving the 4 Month Sleep Regression, I will share my top tips so you can do just that.
The Science Behind the 4 Month Sleep Regression
During the first few months of life, babies spend most of their time in light, dream-like sleep called active sleep or REM sleep. However, around 4 months of age, their sleep cycles start to mature, and they begin to spend more time in deeper, non-REM sleep. This means that they are more likely to wake up between sleep cycles and have difficulty settling back down.
In addition to changes in sleep patterns, your baby's development also plays a role in the 4-month sleep regression. At this age, your baby's brain is developing rapidly, and they are becoming more aware of their surroundings. This increased awareness can lead to overstimulation and difficulty settling down to sleep or even staying asleep.
While the 4-month sleep regression can be a challenging time, it's important to remember that it is a normal and temporary phase. By understanding the science behind regressions and implementing strategies to cope with them, you can help your baby through this developmental milestone and get back to getting the sleep you all need and deserve.
Signs of the 4 Month Sleep Regression
The 4 month sleep regression results in your baby waking up more frequently during the night and they may even have difficulty falling back asleep. Naps may also become shorter and more inconsistent. Some may even wake up ready to start their day at 5:00 am instead of their usual 7:30 am. These are completely normal signs of a sleep regression. Even though we want to celebrate these regressions/progressions caused by developmental milestones, it can be very challenging for parents who are already exhausted and overwhelmed.
Signs of the 4-Month Sleep Regression
So, how can you tell if your baby is going through the 4-month sleep regression?
Here are some common signs to look out for:
Difficulty falling asleep
Waking up more frequently during the night
Shorter naps during the day
Increased fussiness and irritability
Increased hunger and feeding frequency
Changes in sleep patterns
Sleep associations getting stronger
If your baby is exhibiting one or more of these signs, it's likely that they are going through the 4-month sleep regression.
When Will the 4 Month Sleep Regression End?
Unfortunately, there is no exact timeline for when the 4 month sleep regression will end, as it can vary from baby to baby. However, it can last anywhere from 2-4 weeks and can start anytime between 3-5 months. Sometimes it can last longer if sleep associations were created or if they have gotten stronger. Many babies start to naturally improve their sleep patterns around 6 months.
In the meantime, there are some strategies that parents can use to help their baby through this phase, such as establishing a consistent bedtime routine, creating a calm and soothing sleep environment, trying to encourage longer naps during the day, and implementing gentle sleep training strategies. It's also important to remember that this phase is temporary, and with time and patience, your baby's sleep patterns will likely improve.
Surviving the 4 Month Sleep Regression
Now let's talk about some specific strategies you can implement starting today to help your baby (and you) sleep through the 4 month sleep regression:
Have a consistent routine: Establishing a consistent naptime and bedtime routine can help signal to your baby that it's time to sleep. This can include activities such as a bath, a story, or a lullaby. If you do a feeding in the routine then try to offer it before or after the bath and have routine steps after the feeding to help break or prevent the feeding-to-sleep association.
Create a sleep-conducive environment: Start dimming the lights as the routine progresses to help create a spa-like soothing space. Use a sound machine, keep it dark by using blackout curtains and shades, use a humidifier if needed, and keep the room at an appropriate temperature. Keep the sleep space as consistent as possible. This is also a great time to transition them from a bassinet to a crib.
Adjust the sleep schedule as needed: Consider adjusting your baby's sleep schedule to accommodate their changing sleep patterns. This may mean adjusting their awake windows as needed or shifting their bedtime to be earlier or later depending on what works best for your baby that day. Every day may look different and that is okay.
Focus on longer naps: Make sure your baby is getting enough daytime sleep. Around 4 months your baby needs anywhere from 4-5 hours of sleep during the day across 3-4 naps. Aim for each nap to be at least an hour. If your baby is having short naps then implement crib time/hour if they wake up and are not crying or assist the nap by doing a contact nap/hold if they wake up crying. Most of the time if they wake up crying from a short nap they need to sleep longer and are overtired. Shorten those awake windows by 5-10 minutes the next time if needed.
Offer full feeds: Follow an EAT-PLAY-SLEEP routine and offer feeds every 2-3 hours throughout the day. Keep distractions low and baby awake during feeds to ensure they get full feeds.
Have boring weekends: Try to stay home during naptimes as much as possible, especially on the weekends since that is when sleep tends to get off track the most. If your baby takes their best naps during the morning and early afternoon then stay at home for the first two naps and then you can plan some fun activities during the late afternoon and have naps on the go if needed. Be sure to pack a wrap or carrier to have contact naps on the go.
Keep stimulation low: Keep noise levels, bright lights, and other stimulation at a minimum during the last part of the awake window. Decreasing stimulation before sleep can help your baby get to sleep easily.
Track your child’s sleep and feeds: Use a tracking system to track your child’s sleep and feeds. It is hard to keep up with and recall that information if you are sleep-deprived so write it down whether it's the traditional pen and paper way or do it by using an application on your phone such as the Talli Baby Tracker.
Avoid sleep associations: You cannot 100% avoid this one but you can sure do your best. Try to practice eliminating the sleep associations by gently fading them out and gradually getting to the point where you are placing your baby down awake. You can also prevent the feed-to-sleep association by feeding them after they wake up from sleep rather than before sleep. You can always offer a smaller top-off feed before a few naps as needed depending on how strong the association is. Try not to form new sleep associations, especially those you do not want to keep long-term, during this point. Associations formed during sleep regressions can be harder to break and can keep the regression going on longer than it needs to be.
Try gentle sleep training: If your baby is having trouble falling asleep on their own, sleep training can be a helpful tool. There are many different methods to choose from, so do your research and find one that aligns with your parenting style. Remember, sleep training is not CRY-IT-OUT. The first step would be to learn what your sleep training personality is by taking THIS QUIZ! Reminder, it’s all about practice so try it for 5 minutes one day, 10 minutes the next, and if you reach your cap then offer the sleep association they need to fall asleep. No worries. Try again the next day!
Coping Practices for Parents
Managing sleep deprivation is never easy, but it's especially challenging during the 4-month sleep regression. Here are some tips for coping with this difficult time:
Seek help:
Ask for help from friends and family if possible. Even if it's just someone to come over and hold the baby while you take a shower can be so helpful. Remember, every little bit helps, and asking for help won’t make you a bad parent.
Take shifts:
Taking shifts with your spouse, partner, or another caretaker can be so helpful, especially during the night when your baby may be wakings up so often. You sleep from 9-2 and let the other caretaker sleep from 2-7 or vice-versa. For nursing mamas, you can still feed during your sleep window. Simply have them bring you the baby to feed while you still stay in bed and then the other caretaker can finish off the rest of the process of burping, changing diapers, and getting them back to sleep so you do not have to worry about that when it is your sleep window.
Prioritize yourself:
It's essential to take care of yourself during this time, too. Make sure you're getting enough sleep, eating well, and taking breaks when you need them. I personally love to sneak into my calm space for a few minutes to take some deep breaths.
Find support:
Join online communities or local parent groups to connect with other parents who are going through the same thing. Sometimes just knowing you're not alone can make a big difference. JOIN MY WELL-RESTED FAMILIES COMMUNITY TODAY FOR THE SUPPORT, ENCOURAGEMENT, AND SLEEP ADVICE YOU NEED TODAY AND EVERY DAY! I hold coaching calls inside the membership every 2 weeks plus answer your sleep questions as they come up!
Stay positive:
Remember that this is just a season, and it shall pass. Focus on the progress your baby is making and be sure to celebrate their small wins.
Additional Resources
If you're struggling with the 4 month sleep regression, know that you're not alone. It can be tough on everyone, but with some patience and persistence, you and your baby can get through it. And if you're feeling overwhelmed or unsure about how to help your baby sleep better, don't hesitate to reach out for guidance and support.
Here are some resources that are available to you:
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