When Should You Stop Room Sharing With Your Baby?

A mother’s experience…

Sleep deprivation is something we all experience throughout parenthood. Whether you are a first-time parent or a parent with multiple children, chances are that you have felt sleep deprivation at some point in time. During this phase of sleep deprivation, I am sure you have resorted to things that help get you through the night, basically SURVIVAL MODE. This survival mode can include practicing unsafe sleep simply out of desperation. And let me tell you something… WE HAVE ALL BEEN THERE! 

My newborn was attached to me since day one. This meant throughout the day…when I showered, when I ate, when I did anything at all; but most notably, at nighttime when it was time for bed. Sadly, for me, my baby absolutely hated the bassinet that I kept at my bedside for her. I tried night after night to put her in it and nothing worked, not even making accommodations to make it more comfortable for her.

I knew that health professionals and the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) advised against bed-sharing for safety reasons, and I also knew that her crib would not fit in my room. The only other option seemed to be putting her in her own crib, in her own room but I knew this was not something the AAP recommended, nor did I want my baby so far away from me. So, what was I to do? I was as confused as any parent would be.

- Written by Janai Thomas, MPH Candidate

THE TRUTH ABOUT ROOM-SHARING

Before we start talking about room-sharing, I want to make sure you understand the meaning behind the term. When I refer to room-sharing here I am referring to you and your baby sleeping in the same room but in different sleep spaces. You sleeping on your bed and your baby snoozing away (hopefully) in their bassinet, crib, or portable crib/play yard somewhere in your room.

Room-sharing is not the same as bed-sharing. In fact, bed-sharing and room-sharing are both forms of co-sleeping. But, room-sharing families are more likely to practice bed-sharing. A 2020 study found that about 45% of mothers who completed the study survey practiced and intended to practice room-sharing without bed-sharing. 

PROS & CONS OF ROOM SHARING 

The AAP currently recommends that you room-share with your baby for at least the first 6 months and up to 12 months if possible. They recommend this because it decreases the risk of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome. That’s great, but how does room-sharing truly impact you and your baby? And does it actually help reduce the risk of SIDS?

Benefits of Room-Sharing

Room-sharing is great for mothers recovering from postpartum and especially from a cesarean birth. It can also make it easier for mothers to feed their babies throughout the night since they will be eating often throughout the night during the first few weeks. Room-sharing can have long-term benefits on a child’s sleeping habits and patterns. In the 2017 study by Moon, they found that room-sharing until at least 6 months of age can correlate to improved sleep quality and prosocial behavior down the line. A 2019 study found that room-sharing in infancy had no negative impact on a child’s sleep, development, and behavior later in life.  

So what’s wrong with Room-Sharing

What’s confusing is that room-sharing does not mean better sleep for babies and parents. A 2017 paper published on the findings from the INSIGHT STUDY states that babies who room-shared received shorter nights' sleep and were more likely to resort to transitioning baby to bed-sharing in the middle of the night. Another study conducted at the University of Virginia by Rachel Moon found babies who slept in their own room got more sleep compared to those who room-shared.

As you can imagine, having a baby sleeping in your room making all kinds of noises throughout the night can startle some parents causing them to awake at possibly every small sound or motion. Because your baby’s sleep impacts your sleep so much it could lead to sleep deprivation if your baby is sleeping less when room sharing or moving and making noises often throughout the night. 

The 2019 study also found that babies who room-shared were more likely to have more night wakings compared to non room-sharing babies. Independent sleeping babies were also more likely to sleep longer, have a more consistent bedtime routine, and be sleeping prior to 8 PM. 

The INSIGHT STUDY states that there are other underlying risks with room-sharing if it leads to poorer sleep for baby and parents that should also be considered. These can include postpartum depression, relationship struggles, fatigue, and impacting your parenting practices.  I don’t know about you but I always felt uncomfortable being intimate with my husband with my baby being less than 5 feet away from us. 

The studies cited and discussed in this blog including the ones AAP used to create its recommendations have plenty of limitations. Further research needs to be conducted in order to draw proper conclusions that work for both babies and parents.

WHEN CAN YOU TRANSITION YOUR BABY TO THEIR OWN ROOM?

When it comes to your child's sleep, there is no one-size-fits-all approach. My recommendation would be to do what is best for your family in the current season you are in. However, it is important to keep the safety of your infant at the forefront of the decisions that you make. Some parents sleep better knowing they are in the same room as their child while others do better with the child in another room. Some families are tight on space so they have no choice but to room share while others can have a Pinterest-worthy nursery for their children before they are even born.

No matter your situation, know that you always have the best intention for your child so do what feels right to you. Transition your baby to their own room when you are ready and feel that you and your baby will get better sleep once they are in their own room.

CAN I SLEEP TRAIN MY ROOM-SHARING BABY? 

My programs are very accepting of room-sharing and we can work together to help get your baby to sleep better whether they are in your room or in their own room. If you are sleep deprived and struggling with your child’s sleep then please know that you can seek baby sleep help from a baby sleep expert like myself if and when you are ready to go from overtired and sleep-deprived to well-rested and thriving. 

References:

Beijers, Roseriet et al. “Parent-Infant Room Sharing During the First Months of Life: Longitudinal Links With Behavior During Middle Childhood.” Child development vol. 90,4 (2019): 1350-1367. doi:10.1111/cdev.13146

Kellams, Ann et al. “Factors Associated With Choice of Infant Sleep Location.” Pediatrics vol. 145,3 (2020): e20191523. doi:10.1542/peds.2019-1523

Moon, Rachel Y, and Fern R Hauck. “Are There Long-term Consequences of Room-Sharing During Infancy?.” Pediatrics vol. 140,1 (2017): e20171323. doi:10.1542/peds.2017-1323

Moon, Rachel Y et al. “Sleep-Related Infant Deaths: Updated 2022 Recommendations for Reducing Infant Deaths in the Sleep Environment.” Pediatrics, e2022057990. 21 Jun. 2022, doi:10.1542/peds.2022-057990

Paul, Ian M et al. “Mother-Infant Room-Sharing and Sleep Outcomes in the INSIGHT Study.” Pediatrics vol. 140,1 (2017): e20170122. doi:10.1542/peds.2017-0122

Partly written by Janai Thomas, MPH Candidate

Edited by Unnati Patel, MPH